Journal Entry

Dear soul,
It's December 18th,(To start with this is not a emo entry w.e i just needed to rant and get it out of my system, it's not a rant or angry comment towards anyone, and it was just a review of my day if u want to skip the rant Skip to the second paragraph.) I feel like i want to hide from the whole world except for Bonnie, she's the only one that understands, i feel miserable in a way, I feel like im gonna cry again, and it seems wimpy. I dont feel like the cheerful Gummy im supposed to be, and i dont want to pretend to be happy, it's very tiring and stupid once u think about it. It always makes me feel so sick when i want to cry but i hold it in, it's an empty piece of hard chocolate, and i hate the taste. I try to do what im supposed to do, i dont think im doing that well enough, i dont think my friends even notice my appearance, it seems that way... very often. Well, for the friends, i was hanging out with today. It was very lonesome, and it made me think of johnny, it made me think of death, and it made me really wish i could lay on the grass, and lie there like a invisible person forever. I Hate the way people think someone is emo or cuts themselves just because they wish they were invisible, and i hate those who have friends who tell them they're Emo,they're the ones that are "friends" and they're supposed to be there for each other and help them... They're supposed to be my friends...... Ill stop ranting now...

Today was the last day of school till winter break started, it was nice to see my friends, i was of course very happy, :] i sparred with a highlighter against Cristine as usual, and you'd think we'd be insane if u saw us spar each other with high lighters, we stopped using pencils cuz she was scared of the blood i got from the cut ._O she's scared of blood Lolsz ;].we didnt do much for any classes it was sort of partying i dont know 0-0. I Love my presents, im grateful for all of them, nomatter what it is u gave me :], and im in love with Jacky, " i think i fell in love today" Haha with the pendant u gave me ;] I went to walmart after school fallowing Jacky, and friends 0-0 to help chau pick out something for Sarah. I dont think we really ever took a shotcut :] but i got a blister from it . Yay? Part, uhm i wouldnt talk about it... HAha..... It was fun (sarcasm)